Whoah! Check HER Out!

There's no doubt that physical attractiveness is an important part of finding a dating partner (though perhaps not quite as important as we sometimes make it out to be), and we should look for someone we find attractive. But sometimes we use that idea as an excuse to think inappropriate thoughts or let our eyes wander where they shouldn't. I can't speak for girls, but I know for guys this is a real challenge. It takes a great deal of discipline to keep our eyes from wandering where they shouldn't. But we MUST develop that discipline. And the discipline you develop now will serve you well later throughout your marriage. Ultimately it's your thoughts that become the problem, and avoiding letting your eyes wander will help you immensely in avoiding unworthy thoughts.

So where is the balance between noticing a girl's physical attractiveness and letting your eyes wander where they shouldn't?

I once heard a good rule that worked well for me, and I recommend it to every unmarried person. When it comes to checking someone out, stick with the head. Eyes, hair, face, that's all fine. Just don't go below that. Obviously, you'll know if they have an attractive body. You don't have to pan down or stare to figure that out. Just focus on the head, and you'll usually be safe.

After marriage, you trade being able to check out the attractiveness of any girls “head” for being able to check out your spouse head to toe all you want.

Chin up, Brother! (and sister)